Oh well... "All my lyrics!

Today was the last time I saw her eyes shine through mine.
For only a week I was with Anastasia and tomorrow she is leaving from here to live in Belgium for her future.
I'm happy for her but its difficult I didn't expect to expect feelings this fast for someone after Grace. But it was amazing while it lasted...
I've decided to post ALL MY LYRICS, all the lyrics I've written well... the ones i can find because I've done so many I don't know where I've put them hehe.

Dissatisfaction

results wernt growing well
as eachothers pain
were revealing towards the end

a dissatisfaction
disbelief of our status
became more ignorant
we decided to forget
and go on

but the dangers grew closer
confusion blew across our oceans
devastation cried around our minds
a song that played
we wanted to shut down

phases became more and more
we were going down
like 1912
we hit the berg

we knew this
but we chose to ignore
piling up to a tower
to fulfill a path
that we didint see

a dissatisfaction
disbelief of our status
became more ignorant
we decided to forget
and go on

--------

Exposure

as the end was nigh
we started to know this
choking on our own words
to try and set a goal

but exposure
to our truth of our emotions
became more evident
that we no longer tryed

we repressed our feelings
shutting down the truth
allowing ourselfs to fall apart
contact became a chore

denial in our minds
trying to pretend
we have no sorrow
soon to be an unveiled truth

but exposure
to our truth of our emotions
became more evident
that we no longer wanted this

-------

Negotiation

sitting down
trying to play the field
not knowing the rules of the game
we tryed and tryed

negotiation was in place
to settle an agreement
to our love and destiny

we didint know the rules
we continued to ignore
our fate was becoming
a future with no hope

confusion led to this
we faded away
like morning's night sky
we felt unconcious of our love

negotiation was in place
to settle an agreement
to our end and path

--------

Resolution & Transformation

still going on
together we are
but we both know
that its still isnt this

the resolution
isnt working
like the plan was ment to be
a transformation yield to go

an explanation
to the behaviour of our last moments
in this field of sorrow
we couldnt bear no longer

a truth slipping into the world
suspecting something is nigh
i choose to go on
to fight another time

the resolution
isnt working
like the plan was ment to be
a transformation yield to go

-------

Termination

falling down these stairs
a ragdoll pushed around
no freedom in choices
following a path we didint want

termination was the answer
something we both feared was going to happem
trying to put the world back
to way it was

the less we give
the more it comes
we need to accept
that anger and guilt
is not our fault

confused with a new end
to begin a new life
without our eros
feeling this loss

feeling this anger
is ok
Acting on the anger
is not!

going back will not change
our outcome
its gonna be a hard ride
but we gonna integrate
our lifes to acceptance

--------

Her seductive smile

the seductive smile
turns you into stone
freezes you in time
not knowing whats next

i dont care
she is the last ingredient i needed
from the pain ive received
i will be preapared

a new fight
a new desire
to engage this time
a new beginning

her seductive smile
a string of guitars
playing the chords
with a mile to live

eyes that can kill
a thousand men
stronger them kings themselfs
even without the city lights
i see her beauty shine my path

im stupid to do this
but im happy to fall for this

-------

Blowing the smoke

Blowing the smoke
trying to find something
inhaling the future
to forget the past

such a beautiful land
shame to blast them
with a packet or two
what am i doing?

never thought i would do this
why does calm taste like mint?
the feeling is nigh
but its all a lie

Blowing the smoke
trying to find something
inhaling the future
to forget the past

blowing the smoke
trying to hide myself
inhaling the lies
to forget emotion

in a dream im awake
walking through a city
at night with no lights
all i see is a bright cherry

i walk alone
the air tastes of mint
a trail of emotions
in the city of gaudi

the sacred family
searching for a future
if i look back now
all i see is smoke and lies

Blowing the smoke
trying to find something
inhaling the future
to forget the past

blowing the smoke
trying to hide myself
inhaling the lies
to forget emotion

happiness
leaving a trail of sorrow
emptiness
leaving a trail of confussion

a chilling evening
lost with no stars to shine
there not even upside down
oportunity is wide

but the countless times
ive been promised
a life with hope
an emotion i cant find

to an extent that is long
feeling bipolar
blowing smoke
in this cold minty air

have i chosen the right path?
i havent even gone to that road
where a passenger says goodbye
and never looks back

dropping the white sticks
forgetting whats just happened
on the bird that cant go back
i cant even look at it

--------

Burning

Before you take it
i left down this purpose
crawling up and down
burning in a glass house

Suck the life outta me
portray an unlawful paradise
sick and tierd
cant stand your symbol

broken wings
i cant control
any future of mine
not even my past

no help beyond this point
all i need is the truth
i cant even get a lie
not a word from god

sitting and waiting
for the sky to burn me alive
waiting for it to happen
cant stay my skin deteriotes

broken wings
i cant control
any future of mine
not even my past

counter time
full of shit
i cant think
big brother burns me lies

its cold
its hot
i dont fucking know
where to go

sitting here
waiting to be burned alive
to see my life drain

---------

Determinism

A Path that was chosen before

Unity towards our health

Following a dream

A sorrow that seems to fade



I’m sorry to declare

That what we had

Is not what we have

Determinism has its effects



While 42 is everything

It seems not to answer

The question we also asked

To our self’s



My mind will not forget

My heart will not regret

Time for change

In our fates



A path that seems

To brake with cracks

A feeling that should

Never be sorrow



The gratitude will always be there

As times go by

------

Everything Bleeds

im sick and tierd of waiting
its time for you to leave
im seeing the daylight burn my eyes
a vast sky of nothingness

your bleeding us dry
hours of untold stories
unknown inside these doors
were everything changes

outside these worries
i cannot see a change
this has to stop now
choosing a time i will not forgive

you think its just that
depressing our name
to see a fake person
walk the streets

your bleeding us dry
hours of untold stories
unkwown inside these doors
were everything bleeds

i need to go
make my story
a scar on this earth
but with you i know not
this will not change

blame my wrath
for your actions
my fuck ups
to your doings

dont blame me
blame your fucking self
burn this money
why not?!

all you do is dream
stop fucking dreaming
live this fucking life
were more real then your nightmares

your bleeding us dry
hours of untold stories
unkwown inside these minds
were everything bleeds

-------

Eyes of the Darkness "Wrath Version"

Leave It Alone
Dont Complain
All You Are,
Are Hipocrits

The Books Are Our Visions
Soo Leave The Televisions
They Are Just Another Form Of Our Mind

They See...
They Are...
They Are The Eyes Of The Darkness

Theyre Books
With A Look
They Are The Hatred
Look in Yourself
And Youll See More of Whats Out THERE!!!

Our Inner Demon
Is Just Another Book
With No Words
Another Mind
In Another World

They See...
They Are...
They Are The Eyes Of The Darkness


Your Left With No Choice
All To Do is Complain
Your The Ones Who Are Taboo
Soo Go And Leave

Born...
Read...
Watch...
DIE!!!

They Are The Eyes Of The Darkness

------

Eyes of the Darkness "Short Sorrow Version"

Last Thing I Say'd
Was The Thought Of All
When The Truth Fell Apart
I Could Only Fall

Nights Were The Only Choice
I Was Feeling Rushed
In A Not Soo Distant World
In This One I Felt Crushed

Eyes Of The Darkness
Im The Disomniac

------

Fuck it

the feeling inside of me is getting darker
full of shit and full of anger
get rid of it get rid of me
fuck it all shoot it all

shit ive blown out
its let loose
no more please
ive gone to all fuck!
its started
its getting worse

to shit with everything
ill die one day but not today
my hour is now time to fuck it all

ive been driven to rage
i have a vision
a vision with our blood spilt together
to unify our fucked up lifes

im laughing at my failure
it starts a better beginning
ill start on everything
that includes you

to shit with everything
ill die one day but not today
my hour is now time to fuck it all

ive gone to all fuck!
its started
its getting worse

shit!
its ripped out of my mind
theres a black hole of non existence
in my thoughts
now the darkness has spread

uncontrolable fear
desired rage
uncontrolable fear
desired rage
uncontrolable fear
desired rage
uncontrolable fear
desired rage
uncontrolable fear
desired rage

fuck it

-------

Glorious Road

lights everywhere
imagination follows
slipping into a new world
to discover my mind

it flashes in my eyes
the wonderous pain
the frighting glory
its a vision to fulfill

Glorious road
entities of people
following theyre paths
in theyre mind

Glorious Road
flying so high
a new imagination
in my mind

present holding the future
our minds follow
slipping into the imagination
to discover a path

it flashes in my eyes
the wonderous pain
the frighting glory
its a vision to fulfil

-------

Hands of Blood

left alone and cried aside
we all follow some idiot
one day or another
we will make them follow

we are more pathetic
then our own shadow
crossed between sides
and left alone

my names untitled
left for the devil to decide
ive got my new crown of thorns
my heart made from barbwire

ill hurt anything that i touch
theyre heart will turn to coal
i have no shadow anymore
even my reflection has left me

left alone and cried aside
we all follow some fucker
one day or another
we will make them burn

i see blood dripping
down your heart
with the message of hate
burnt onto your palm of your hand

my heart and mind are the pentagram
let it burn
let it go dark as coal


left alone and cried aside
we all follow some fucker
one day or another
we will make them burn

--------

Heroes of Silence

*Intro - Susurando
Silence...
Heroes...

I Dont wanna go down in time
in a dark hole of silence
in a time of dead heroes
with a city of no lights

I Dont wanna go down in life
in a dark hole of torture
in a time of dead minds
with a city of no lights
(x2)

Heroes of silence
dead independence
Heroes of silence
dead independence
Heroes of silence
dead independence
Heroes of silence
dead independence

Tired of of being dead
white masks hiding
dead silent heroes
cant hide anymore

Staring at my imagination
tortured and mindfucked
take a breath and die
in a city with no lights

-------

I wasn't

I wasnt awake to find you alive
i didint care anymore to survive
all i needed right now
is the space between time

I wasnt there to help myself
i didint care about my health
I shot it down like a bird
surviving with one last word

I wasnt there
I wasnt alive
I wasnt myself
I burned my wealth

I wasnt awake to find you alive
i didint care anymore to survive
all i needed right now
is the space between time

I wasnt there to help myself
i didint care about my health
I shot it down like a bird
surviving with one last word

I wasnt there
I wasnt alive
I wasnt myself
I burned my wealth

Im walking away
actually feeling alive now
but lost inside somehow
burning through the doorway

Let me think about this
Why isnt it all bliss?
havent lost contact
all been soo abstract

I wasnt awake to find you alive
i didint care anymore to survive
all i needed right now
is the space between time

I wasnt there to help myself
i didint care about my health
I shot it down like a bird
surviving with one last word

------

Indulge my Paradise

i sleep till dawn arises
my brains cries pain
indulge this forgiveness
trying to fall upwards

creepy walls bounce
i see no blue
i taste sound
instead i bleed my mind

i lost my bunny
the forrest is dark
i walk alone
spiralling towards humanity

indulge my paradise
as my inferno flutters
chaos feels happy today
please go

i dont intend to laugh
to your pity
i want to fly
towards the blood

i feel your mind
its just like shock
to my hunny hive
ive just killed
i feel you

indulge my paradise
as my inferno flutters
love feels sad today
let me go

indulge my paradise
as my inferno flutters
thy feels happy today
the effect can happen

-------

IT

I try To lift up
but i keep falling
ive left to grow for soo long
but now i cant take it any longer

my love for it is tremendous
but i cannot do anything but let it break
my heart is too heavy for it
i cant keep waiting for it to grow

all the things i do is for it
but no matter what i keep falling
i want to make it grow
i dont want it to break

i have no other things to do
ive been lefdt here with one door
to choose from
only one chair to sit on behind it
if i sit it will brak

soo my choice is not go through the door
and suffer the consecuences
ill fall on the floor and shiver to death
but i will not break it
i will die of the wait
but i will not break it

fuck it
ill die
foreget it
i wont break it
fuck it
ill shiver
i wont break it

ive touched it
thats gone too far
its made out of glass
i dont want to sit on it

i rather destroy my mind and my heart
then sit on it
i couldnt bare seeing it be destroyed by ones own self pitty
destroy me
and fuck it
kill me
and fuck it
make me suffer
FUCK IT

i love it to much
i will not be selfish
soo ill crumble in my mind
and become mad insane and fucked up

let me be
let me die

--------

I've gave what I can


Ive Been Sleeping All A Long
With Distraut
And A Mirrage
I Could Bare No Longer

Caos Has Been Sleeping
But No Longer Will It Keep Dying

Ive Gave What i Can
To Trust What I Tryed

My Mind Has Been Resting
I Am Awoken From A Dream
A Dream That Bares No Mirrage To My Life
It Was Caos Who Was Beside Me All A Long

To All It Belongs To None
But Now Caos Can No Longer Wait
Its Destrucytion Has Started

It Started In My Nightmares
But It Will Finnish on You

Ive Gave What i Can
To Trust i Tryed

Ive Been Sleeping All A Long
With Rage
And Remorse
I Could Wait No Longer

Pain Has Raised Another Level
Wake Up Now

To All It Belongs To None
But Now Caos Can No Longer Wait
Its Destrucytion Has Started

It Started In My Nightmares
But It Will Finnish on You

Ive Gave What i Can

Im Lying On my Own Blood
Shaking From Fear
Shaken From Sorrow
Shaken From Rage
Shaken From...

--------

Mixtured Emotion


one thing
has a beginning
but finally an end
all i did was forgive
all you did was forget

Mixtured emotion
a sleeve of tears
will wipe away soon
were all falling
to rise back up

im gonna miss this
yes i am
a un-united bond
fully untrusted

we gave what we can
you never delivered
time for you to leave
we do not want this lies

Mixtured emotion
a sleeve of tears
will wipe away soon

Mixtured emotion
a sleeve of sadness
will wipe away soon

growing in this field
i see the stars again
but we need you gone
walk away now

follow your eden
lets just start again
im upset
you left us no choicce

you have mix of emotion
leaving with us empty
carried a trail of dispair
were all alone now

Mixtured emotion
a sleeve of hapiness
will be here soon

-------

November "Short"

To the end of all flaws
we killed the cause
continue this bridge
as i become vintage

May the dreams be sweeter
than i ever was
May the keys be strong
than they ever were

Remember
It was only november
the night with fire
only i could admire

Forget
that it was a net
the dawn with death
my last breath

------

Sexual Vamnpires


shape your name in the smoke
i carved our name on the old oke
time to drink to a new memory
and ill be your last breath

Sexual vampires
it was all fire
we burned!
we shared the pain
we burned!
it felt like cocaine
we burned

shape your heart in the smoke
i carved our sex on the old oke
time to drink to a new beauty
ill be your death

Sexual vampires
it was all fire
we dreamed
we shared the end
we dreamed
it felt like acid
we dreamed

cant follow you on
it was all drawn
i wont forget
the last sunset

we will not be diminished
you will be my cherished
ill will remember the bite
on the dawn of midnight

--------

Summers Nightmare

I had an energy
powerful and free
Now my hearts trapped
covered in chains

confused with wrath
i feel like walking away
and not to come back
im not flying anymore

a summers nightmare
loosing days
all the time
its failed

its to time walk
i dont need this
let me go
set me free

a summers nightmare
a lost heart
in time again
its all symmetric

confused with love
i feel like its a chore
symmetric love
time to fall away

------

The Limits of Choice

In times like this
I’m still young and versatile
What can I do? If your love constrains me
The contact is getting too much
Limited to what I can do

I can’t be the same
You look at me like I’m weird
But that’s the way I am

The limits of choice
I can’t think what to do anymore
I want to be me
You say you don’t control our relasonship
But I do something that is me
And I’m a freak from space

I can’t be with this
Our love is there
But there isn’t that feeling
We used to have

I want the freedom
I want my choices
Not to be looked down upon

--------

Scent on the wind

as i stand in fear
the unkown next is to come
as she follows the wind
her scent is drawn to beauty

the obstacle just like there is
is the one she follows
as she doesnt the truth
of the scent on the wind

feeling full
also with doubt
but this is it
i need to follow
the wind

her scent is strong
just like a perfume
a poisones perfume of innocence

she is like the wind
a powerful gust of desire
a strong infinity of envy
i feel her scent on the wind

powerless and shaken
this is not how it was ment to happen
but ill fight to have it
this scent is my addiction
to find a new way of life

--------------

untill the end

ropes and strings
calling all lies
to tighten this burden
to reunite a lost cause
we bled together
burning a summers day

no one will understand this
except us
we will see
how moonlights change

the lunatic heart
not hiding against you
no more friendly fire
your skin is cold
but flames in my blood
will warm your heart

chances are always given
why not now
the end was nigh
but fuck it
lets end it together

one day these strings will part
in a direction that splits
for a choice we dont understand
but we know its what we want

suspended in all test of love
i still manage to gain your heart
untill the end
we haved reached our goal

untill the end
beneath this moonlight

untill the end
when i see no summer dawn

untill the end
with haunted kiss

untill the end
when we meet again

---------

White Days

Our Days Are Still Bright
Some how theyre brighter at times
even when its dark you still shine

Our First Day Was A White Day
And Soo Will Every day to come

close inside with a dark mind
i mime to the words
your hearts sings to me

little bright there
little hell here
little you here and now

touch that key
and make my hurt pump
on the white days
of our life

the beginning is everyday
left with no choices
but to love all day

Our First Day Was A White Day
And Soo Will Every day to come

Our First Day Was A White Day
And Soo Will Every day to come

let your hair flow with the wind
let me be your king

you sayd white is the beginning
to start something
soo white is everyday of our beginning

ill still stay up at night
to wait you fall asleep
soo no one can hurt you
on our beautiful white day

let me flow with your hair
shining more then sun itself
but couldnt shine more then
our hearts together

Our Days Are Still Bright
Some how theyre brighter at times
even when its dark you still shine

-------------

You know what?

I see you burn
i see you set a light
I see you fade away in my dreams

Awoken by the smell of lies
To see all my memories
fade in ash like false endings
what is this?

walking through a silent street
i see blind minds
everything seems far away
to reach a new start

I see you rot
I see you not
I see the flames at the end of my dreams

I see you fade away
I see you so far away
I saw it coming

Awoken by the smell of lies
To see all my memories
fade in ash like false endings
you know what Fuck YOU!

Walking through city lights
i hear the music
everything seems to be fun
a presence of evil

Now Im alive
alive and well to see
what has always been there
a faded memory

-----------------

Your My Cure.



Your my cure
to the disease
that never existes
untill my vains
turned black

i fell in to your loneliness
and turned to the bones of eden
to follow our paths

your my cure
sweet cure
thats tastes like a cold afternoon
on a burning morning

i stumble on these streets
where eyes on the floors
looking down at me
disgust is theyre shame

leaving a trail of blood
a disease without motto
i couldnt beleive
i was here

your my cure
to the disease i have
to fall on my own blood
to taste my own mind

finding the date
to be right to you
but the pain follows

i cant see no more
to whats right in front of me
i cant see I CANT SEE
fuck i need a cigerette
to burn my sorrows away
to blow the smoke
of red blood
of the victims past and present

Your my cure
to the disease
i am nicotine
to your lungs
im bad for you
but you cant stop

lets face it
you know soon
youll have to leave
and leave the disease behind
to cure everyone else

I am cancer to society
they dont fucking care
im there alone on the streets
the night is bright
and i follow the moon
to my grave

---------

Shrouded Love

Shining them eyes one last time
remembering our pasttime
skies are dawning red
its all in our head

i may not be here
when you come back
beautiful moments
will never ever crack

shrouded love
terms of our end
not to offend
its never above

Shining them eyes one last time
remembering our pasttime
skies are dawning red
its all in our head

i may not be here
when you come back
beautiful moments
will never ever crack

it was all green
it was never obscene
one day again
we will pass through

-------------

I do have many more but on my old HDD. and it would fill up this page a lot.
If you did have the time to read them all please let me know whats your favourite? and why?

Change!

Well lately few big things are happening.
Awesome parties, epic concerts, meeting all these new awesome people, this summer seems to be fucking awesome, lets just see how it continues, because im liking it.
Also, Some know some dont, but ive been seeing someone, shes called Anastasia, and shes really really nice and very beautiful, and im happy : ) so thats good.
Anyways
Heres some photos from Brujas Rock 2010 & Goymar Festival 2010!

View all

View all

Hope you liked them

Your dead to me...

Your dead to me. 

Bye

Tonight ive gotten term to myself, and i dont care or give a shit about her anymore. Its too personal to post here but ive finally let go of her, not in the way i wanted, but now i dont want ANYTHING to do with her.

You Fucking Disappoint Me!

Dead as dead can be
My doctor tells me
But I just can't believe him
Ever the optimistic one
I'm sure of your ability
To become my perfect enemy

Wake up and face me
Don't play dead 'cause maybe
Someday I will walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way

Leaning over you here
Cold and catatonic
I catch a brief reflection
Of what you could and might have been
It's your RIGHT and your ability
To become my perfect enemy

Wake up 
(Why can’t you?)
And face me
(Come on now)
Don't play dead 
(Don’t play dead)
'Cause maybe
(Because maybe)
Someday 
(Someday)
I will walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way

Maybe you're better off this way (×4)
You're better off this (×2)
Maybe you're better off...

Wake up 
(Why can't you?)
And face me
(Come on now)
Don't play dead 
(Don’t play dead)
'Cause maybe
(Because maybe)
Someday 
(Someday)
I will walk away and say
You fucking disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way!

Go ahead and play dead
(GO!)
I know that you can hear this
(GO!)
Go ahead and play dead
(GO!)

Why can't you turn and face me?
(WAKE UP!) 
Why can't you turn against me?
(WAKE UP!)
Why can't you turn against me?
(WAKE UP!)
Why can't you turn against me?
(GO!)
You fucking disappoint me

Passive-aggressive bullshit... (×12)

The song is Passive by A Perfect Circle, 

The lyrics are perfect in terms of how i feel right... but guess what FUCK IT ALL! when i leave this god forsaken island fuck the lot of you in a nice you.!

AND TONIGHT!! Is time to fucking rock!!!!!! Brujas Rock Concert, 3 Heavy metal bands, from 22:00 in el fraile!! get down there!!!!!!

And the after party is sponsored by me drinking it dry!

Hopefully just maybe

Hmmm... In this blog you possibly will not understand anything about to say, but maybe someone will : ).
Distanced far away, i can barely talk anymore, i cant even go outside without breathing this air, knowing its still there, Why? tell me why cant i walk away from this? Why is it soo hard? maybe i dont need to, i dont want to walk back, i dont want it again, but I do, im confused not knowing what to do next. Maybe the new start is with this new air, its happy, content, lustrous about this new way, happy for me to walk that path, its welcoming and faint hearted to new life, a new love. Hopefully, just maybe, its a happy direction, a nice start, becuase its a nice view from where i stand, i do miss my old breath, my old mind that was shared with one other, it feels like ive broken off this tree, following a new scent, but still confused.

I know this is better, but one can still miss the old breath once or twice taken with one other. Hide and seek now.

I still feel that sahara desert, i still think the stars are upside down, and i still want it, but i know i cant, i know i cant walk back, oh fuck, i dont know...

Hopefully just maybe, soon something beautiful will happen...

I'm sorry but i intended to keep writing but i just cant maybe another day...

Experience of a life time in 8 hours

Last night, Me, Leo, Cris and Gavin, went for a Camping trip, we had 2 tents, a car, food, crisps, drinks, cigarettes and weed. But we had one special ingredient to this beautiful night, Shrooms!! Yup we had Magic Mushrooms, but only 1 each, but that's all we needed as none of us has tried this stuff before.

Next morning, Gavin is a zombie 

We got there around 7:30 i think it was and starting to set up the tents, We found the most perfect place in the world, La Caldera!. It wasn't to far into the middle of no where so we were good.
Later on, after we set up everything we built a safe mini BBQ for our meats, after a few good minutes we started munching on our burgers, quiet delicious actually. It was about 10:30, and we all decided to eat our shrooms, At the same time, we were rolling up some nice joints thanks to Gavin and Leo, it sort of eased the time go by because shrooms do take they're time to make effect, after about 20 - 30 minutes we all started laughing and giggling, I think Gavin was the first to actually feel shit going on, he felt the trees move, and I thought the sky was painted on like on a ceiling, then after 2 hours the highest point of the effect kicked in, and it was fucking magical, we all were connecting with nature, The tree in front of me became my friend, even thou she looked like she was giving me the finger it also looked like the heavy metal sign, I called her Enya, just like the singer. There were so many trips going on and different things, everything was perfect.

Watering Enya the next morning :)

After many hours of repetitive stuff, we were getting tired so we tried to sleep, we got in our tents and tried to sleep but no one could, after a while I herd a car come, there was a car parked just a minute walk from us, they couldn't see us but we saw them, Couple of teens, drinking heavily even the driver was, throwing all they're cans outside, its disgusting, eventually they left and we all decided to get out and see what they left, and it was rubbish everywhere, they left loads of cans all over the floor, fucking pigs, they need to respect the woods, we picked up most of they're crap and put in a bag and decided to return, eventually it was 5 in the morning and no one wanted to sleep now.

It was about 8 in the morning, no one has slept, and we all looked like shit, we decided to pick up our shit and clean out our area, and we did leave it clean as a whistle thou, not like them pigs earlier on, anyways, we got everything stuffed in the car and went to the area where the public have BBQ's, we decided to cook our left over meat last night, and again this tasted like gold, it was delicious, thanks to Leo and Cris, they made a lot of effort.

Just before we left

Around 11:45 ish we decided to leave and go home, as we were all tired, I got home at 13:15 and fell straight to sleep it was around 30 minutes a go I woke up.

Anyways, it was the best night of my life the experience was amazing, if you ever try shrooms, just read about it, make sure what your doing, and try not get poisonous mushrooms.

Last nights soundtrack:
Moby - Wait for me *Whole album*
Enya - The very best of Enya.

I recommend this music for trips its amazing.

Thanks to Leo and Cris for putting so much money into it,
and Gavin for the delicious herbs and shrooms.

Danny Vain Photography LINKS

My Brand new portfolio!

with new gallery and biography!

Danny Vain Photography

iDoser with Life

Well I tried something new last night, A digital drug, a sound wave called Binaural Beats, that create a weird sound using stereo headphones, the program is orginally called SBaGen, that plays the sounds using MS-DOS, but now a new program called iDoser for PC, iPhone and iPod. will have these sounds BUT for a price. right now I've got over 80+ sounds, I've only tried Alcohol and Divinorum. and... THEY WORK. Ok... maybe not as strong as real drugs but they do certainly work, also there's no brain damage or any other damage just a "high" nothing to fear.

It quiet interesting, something maybe you thought would be in a dystopian movie, where you insert cables into your ears and get high. well, now is time.
I suggest to try it, search about it on they're forums. I going try more sounds and see what I get.

Sometimes... A Spotless Mind is Eternal...

Sometimes i think to myself I did the right thing, I chose the right decision, but then... i think again, sometimes i turn my head and see what the other side of the choice would of been, i try to kill my emotion, music helps, but not always and the same with a joint now and again. Love? is easy to say but actually feel it is harder then understanding this universe, when you come to point where Love feels like a salt lake, no where to go, dry, bored, annoyed, and driving you crazy, you try to lick the last drops of this lake but its all too late, I, myself I've come to a drought in Love, where i no longer can keep going, it saddens me and others, and I wish this didn't have to happen at all, i wish it was the sea, just never ending, it also could you drive you mad, but at least you would be full of Love, full of Joy. Love is a two way story, that also includes the fellow evil twin Anger, Wrath, Depression, Fury and many more...
Our time was long, beautiful, challenging and rewarding, but this journey seems to stop here, maybe, just maybe one day it will continue again, maybe in a different life.

I'm not scared of showing my emotion, telling you what I'm actually feeling about this situation, I'm not fearing the future, because I don't fear the unknown, I'm angry at what's to come, promises that right now don't seem to be happening, also adding that life right now here on this island is absolutely fucked up, its demolishing peoples life's, the government aren't helping shit. but that's not the point of this message. Sometimes I loose myself in my crazy little conspiracy theory mind, questioning everything, because life hasn't given me an answer yet, not just life, but everything isn't just what it seems, everything has more then one answer, more then the so called truth, I question Love, why is it so easy to fall in Love, but so fucking hard to get you out of my mind? You may wonder WHY!? why would i want to take her out of my mind? well... I don't want to feel like this, and I don't mean in Love but this weird way, its very unexplainable but its a negative feeling. There was just loads shit going on, small nuisances, that annoyed both of us, Our Love became Asymmetric, upside down, a fucking oxymoron. It was difficult to understand and harder to feel it everyday. Now I feel Free, not the feeling of "oh great IM SINGLE!!11!!" It's about the feeling of not being trapped, I felt like I was in chains... but I'm feeling better now, even thou "home" isn't doing very well at ALL!! but myself is feeling better "i do have a cold now thou :)". I will not delete or forget my past 2 years, I don't want to, They were the best I've ever had... But now its time to move on me and my spotless mind!

Brand new blog

Well after using the internet like anyone for many years now, ive actually made a Blog, whats it gonna be about? anything really, from my photography, journal, problems, questions and many more.

Ill be writing more and more soon!