ADHD-I

For a long time, I kept thinking their was something wrong with me, like why do I fail so badly at school? even though I did try? and relasonships, they seem to fail in many areas, espcially in arguments, if I get nervous I shut down, and the next day I will not remember properly that argument or conversation, and everyday things like Im a photographer, but in reality Ive got so many photos to edit, videos to edit, thing to finish, I hardly ever finish anything, it needs to fully impress me or have a major advantage for me, I know it sounds self-fish but its how it works with me, as much as I dislike it myself, Ive talked to a few people and many dont understand I cant just say "Ok Im going to do this..." If my subconcious doesnt like it, it will NOT happen, Ive started books, songs, photos, videos, websites, anything really, and most of them are half done. If I get pushed to hard aswell, it gets worse, and worse. I get easily distracted by random stuff, that will make me forget about small things I got told to do, like maybe I was ment to phone someone, or tell someone something, Its seriously not my fault and I dont intend to forget about such things, and If I have done this to you before I apologise...
I constantly loose items, watches, lighters, random things, at school was worse, I never had pens or pencils or rulers or any stationary stuff because I would loose them. Its shit...
If I do start something like editing a photo that I find a job or chore, I will be easily distracted, and If im distracted I wont finish them, especially If I need to deeply concentrate on something I dont exactly want to.
One thing is I am pretty good at organizing events pretty quickly, but I try and avoid that, and make everything in the moment and go with the flow, also due to the fact I loose track of time completly, Multitasking can be hard aswell, depending if I like such tasks. Ive been looking online, about peoples stories about ADHD-I and they are extremely similar to mine. I was school dropout, I left at 16, and most of my jobs I got fired and never lasted a year... Im lazy but not because I want to be lazy I hate it, I fucking hate it... I find leaving this island might help, it depresses me, irritates me, and bores the living shit out of me. I cant stand it, maybe it doesnt help the ADHD-I im not sure.

A website I just found indicates these are the following symptoms an Adult has when with ADHD-I or ADD

Adults	Often making careless mistakes when having to work on uninteresting or difficult projects
	Often having difficulty keeping attention during work, or holding down a job for a significant amount of time
	Often having difficulty concentrating on conversations
	Having trouble finishing projects that have already been started
	Often having difficulty organizing for the completion of tasks
	Avoiding or delaying in starting projects that require a lot of thought
	Often misplacing or having difficulty finding things at home or at work
	Disorganized personal items (sometimes old and useless to the individual) causing excessive "clutter" (in the home, car, etc.)
	Often distracted by activity or noise
	Often having problems remembering appointments or obligations, or inconveniently changing plans on a regular basis